Please resist the urge to tell the owners of Garland’s new Blitz Sports Bra and Grill that they typo’d on the sign.
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They know, and they did it on purpose.
Co-owners and former police officers Frank Negron and Bruce D'Ostroph — the latter retired from the NYPD and the former from Dallas’ finest — concocted the seemingly scrambled name to draw attention to the place and accentuate what might be the establishment’s main attraction — comely, curvy female servers wearing sports bras.
"It is a breastaurant, if you want, like Hooters or Twin Peaks, but that's as far as it goes,” Negron told Pegasus News. “The girls are dressed like little referees.”
Little referees … how adorable.
Anyway, the wordplay extends beyond the joint’s name — and don’t read anything into “blitz” because they don’t necessarily want customers to become, you know, blitzed — to the menu items, which include sports references such as the choke and Olympic, tied to the chicken salad and onion rings, respectively.
Good luck to the guys, though, because over and above the typical hurdles — sports, see? — facing a new business, construction woes might hamper its early-going. Highway construction makes it hard to get to, Negron allowed, and the website remains a work in progress.
Might be worth the effort, though, because, as the website placeholder states, “It’s not your mom’s sports bra,” and thank God for that.
The views and opinions expressed here are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of NBC, NBC 5, NBCDFW.com or its employees.
Bruce Felps owns and operates East Dallas Times, an online community news outlet serving the White Rock Lake area. He’s been on the inside plenty of sports bras, and yeah, that was an intentional typo.