Domestic violence can affect every member of the family, including children. Even if they’re never touched, experts say children who witness family violence are affected in ways similar to children who are physically abused.
The SafeHaven emergency shelter in Arlington is a protected place of refuge. It's where SafeHaven of Tarrant County offers what's been lost.
"For children to thrive they need to feel safe," said Susan Van Meter, the children's coordinator at SafeHaven's Arlington shelter.
Van Meter said living in fear can cause a list of affects in children: emotional, physical, social and behavioral.
For one three-year-old boy at their shelter, witnessing violence produced even more of it.
"When he felt out of control he would take his foot and he would put it in his mouth and bite down. And if he could not access his foot because his shoe was on, he would bite his arm, he would pull his hair, but he would begin self-harming. And it was the only way that he felt he could center himself in that chaos," Van Meter said.
She said a more common reaction to family violence is a child repeating the actions of the abuser.
"So they may duplicate a physical behavior. They may hit mom, or pull her hair, or they may say a set of words that the person abusing their mother uses," Van Meter said.
"And these are little kids?" NBC 5's Kristin Dickerson asked.
"These are little kids, absolutely, and our older kids do the same thing," Van Meter said.
But the kids don't know that it's wrong, because for children who witness abuse—it's their normal.
Local
The latest news from around North Texas.
"We do not want to teach them that mommy and daddy are wrong," Van Meter said. "What we want to teach them is just a different way to look at relationships, and how a relationship can be healthy without having yelling and hitting."
Van Meter said some parents do choose to go back their abusive relationships, but no matter what, SafeHaven will always offer help without judgment.
"No matter how many times you need to hear a counselor's voice talk you through this, and uplift you, and show you that it doesn't have to be like this," Van Meter said, "we're going to be here every time."
With hope that it will be the last time, because home should be your safe haven.
Call 1-877-701-SAFE (7233) for SafeHaven's free and confidential 24-hour hot line.
