Rick Perry’s Locks Go Green - NBC 5 Dallas-Fort Worth

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Rick Perry’s Locks Go Green

Perry’s head, hair depicted as 6-foot chia-pet planter



    Rick Perry’s Locks Go Green

    by Bruce Felps

    Is this a tribute or a lampoon?

    A liquid fertilizer company, Dairy Waste Management, that uses bovine excrement to make Cow Wow commissioned a planter in which to demonstrate the product’s results. At least I think that’s why they ordered it.

    This is no ordinary planter, though. It’s a 6-foot-tall chia-pet type container shaped like Rick Perry’s head. The hair-ivy only grows from the scalp, far as I can tell, and not the nostrils and ears.

    Oh, and in the name of equal time blah-blah, there's also a version that looks like Bill White, Perry's last gubernatorial challenger.

    According to the article at TheAwl.com, the seller — oh yes, it’s for sale at $4,500 — maintained “the outline of his hair is surprisingly accurate." Except it’s green.

    Then again, maybe that’s Perry’s environmental policy. “Chia-pet heads for everybody!”

    Makes about as much sense as some of the other stuff he says.

    Bruce Felps owns and operatesEast Dallas Times, an online community news outlet serving the White Rock Lake area. He restrained himself from making manure-for-brains jokes and injured a couple of internal organs. 

    The views and opinions expressed here are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of NBC, NBC 5, NBCDFW.com or its employees.

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