Ol' Wade Busts Out With The Tweets

You’re wondering when this whole Twitter phenomenon will go away. Die off. Fade into oblivion, so that we can all go back to our normal lives and forget that Twitter ever played a significant role in them. You’re wondering when the site’s true decline and delicious, MySpace-style downfall will begin in earnest.

Well, today is that day. People of Dallas, I give you the official Twitter page of Cowboys head coach Wade Phillips, and it’s every bit as scintillating as you thought it would be! LET’S SUCK ON SOME OF WADE’S SWEET TWEETS!


on the plane to Minnesota

Oooh, juicy! Don’t go in the plane bathroom while the Double J and Susan Skaggs are using it!


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Roy did not break his collarbone--he is just fine--he had a big smile when i saw him last

Roy was smiling because he had just come from slamming the door in the pizza boy’s face without tipping him.


I don't have as much time as Marty B to tweet---keep up with him and you will have fun

Honestly Wade, should you have ANY time to tweet? Should there be any moment in the day where are not doing something useful to help the Cowboys not choke away a playoff spot?


saw Julie and Julia thought it was good

Well, that is the most damning quote from a head coach of a football team I’ve ever seen. People of Dallas, your head coach likes watching Nora Ephron films, probably while eating whole pints of Ben & Jerry’s and cuddling with his cat. THAT’S NOT FOOTBALL.

In all seriousness though, the fact that Wade has a Twitter feed suggest that the Cowboys, contrary to pretty much every other team in the NFL, have no problem with members of the organization using the microblogging service. And I applaud the team having that attitude. Twitter is harmless, and it’s just one more way to unreasonably obsess over your favorite team. So keep on tweeting, coach Phillips. But when you go see “The Proposal,” you keep that to yourself.

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