Going Once … and For All

License plate auction on tap

by Bruce Felps

If there are two things I love about this little gig, they’re lists and license plates.

Oh, and sarcasm.

Anyway, the whole license plate auction hubbub finally comes to a conclusion Thursday when the state, in tandem with MyPlates.com, auctions off specialty tags just for you, and you can have them.

It’s supposed to be a big deal because the personalized options include seven-character combinations rather than the state-mandated six established in and unchanged since 1965, so that gives clever people one more letter or number to work with when trying to slip a little double entendre past the censors.

The choices include all manner of background designs, which should make state identifications a snap for cops during traffic stops. One option shows a red backdrop with the word “SOONERS,” and that should not be allowed in Texas.

The auction runs online and in the physical world, 7 p.m., Jan. 13, at Cowboys Coliseum.
Winners lock up the plates for 25 years, with renewal options every 10 years thereafter. The plates also are transferable, making the little darlings the perfect family heirloom, and what a caring last-will-and-testament legacy that would make.

“Son, [cough, sputter] I have no money left for your inheritance [wheeze] but I leave you with these ‘GIDDY UP’ license plates.”

“Gosh, Dad, I’m, I’m [reaches for pillow] …”

Bruce Felps owns and operates East Dallas Times, an online community news outlet serving the White Rock Lake area. He thanks the mercies that this thing will finally be over.

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