Permanent Purgatory for RINOs

New group will identify moderate GOPers for easier vilification

The Republican party has formed a new group, called the National Council for a New America, which will allow them to root out whatever moderates still lurk within the party. It will also identify the GOP's most promising prospects for the 2012 presidential nomination, so that ideological stalwarts can get to work completely ruining those candidates' reputations well in advance of the all-important primaries.

John McCain, Bobby Jindal, Mitt Romney, Hayley Barbour, Jeb Bush ... all of these past and possibly future presidential candidates will get to tour the country in a series of town hall-style meetings that will "rebrand" Republicans as the sexier, hipper alternative to Democrats.

"One of the things that's constantly stated by the Obama administration spokesman is that the Republicans are the 'party of no,' and that the conservatives don't have ideas," said former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush, whose brother, President George W. Bush, many blame for the party's unpopularity. "But conservatives, in general, have not done a great job on putting forward their ideas."

So what are these ideas? The "Blueprint for our Conversation with America" includes proposals on the economy, healthcare, education, energy, and national security. In other words, precisely those dull, go-nowhere issues that fail to draw massive crowds of die-hard Republican voters who'd much rather hear about the abortion scourge or the evils of immigration or the real story about how gay marriage caused both the swine flu and the Chrysler bankruptcy.

The true leaders of the GOP will likely remain outside this elite cabal of centrist-ish Republicans. We refer, of course, to Sarah Palin, Newt Gingrich, Rush Limbaugh, and most recently the visionary young woman from California, Carrie Prejean, who boldly stood up to a gay blogger on that television show that one time.

Together this "Gang of Four" may continue to drive away just enough moderate voters to give President Obama a second term and ensure that the Republican party remains as pure as it is unpopular. Meanwhile, the National Council for a New America will serve as a sort of permanent purgatory for RINOs, who should just be glad they don't get kicked out of the party altogether.

Sara K. Smith writes for NBC and Wonkette.

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