With all that is wrong with the NFL, from steroid use to cheating scandals to dreadful officiating, commissioner Roger Goodell has decided the league's most important issue is ... mascot mischief on the sidelines? Really? Perhaps this is a calculated misdirection by the politically savvy Goodell to steer our attention, if only momentarily, away from the problems that currently have fans -- particularly those with gaming interests -- screaming "CONSPIRACY!" on a weekly basis.
Assuming any of this is true, it then makes perfect sense that the NFL would set their sights on Rowdy, described by the Dallas Morning News' Tim MacMahon as the "Cowboys' lovably obnoxious mascot." You see, his ass is now grass.
That darn rabble-rouser got himself on double-secret probation with the NFL. His trouble started when T.O. and Rowdy exchanged a chest bump after a touchdown in the Monday night game against the Eagles.
Some uptight NFL dudes got their britches in a bunch about prearranged celebrations involving mascots and threatened to slap the Cowboys with a five-figure fine. Jerry Jones ... eventually decided that it'd be in the Cowboys' best interests to minimize the mascot's exposure during games.
Rowdy is banished to the locker room except for pregame and a brief third-quarter appearance to fire T-shirts into the crowd.
Good God, this is what it's come to? A group of grouchy, uptight NFL suits sitting around a conference table plotting ways to make games even more boring? Look, mascots are completely useless, but of all the things that need fixing, the NFL brain trusts are targeting Rowdy for a prearranged celebration with Terrell Owens? Um, yeah, that makes sense.
Or as one commenter on the DMN Cowboys blog asked: "I wonder...when the NFL suits get the mascot crisis under control, will they then have time for things like pre-union player pensions and consistent, competent officiating?"
Seemingly reasonable question, and one that I fully expect the league to ignore. Because, you know, they're too busy eradicating the fringe element from the game. It's the Lord's work, after all.
NFL Now Threatening to Fine Teams for Rambunctious Mascots originally appeared on NFL FanHouse on Wed, 19 Nov 2008 10:45:00 EST . Please see our terms for use of feeds.