ROYALLY OFFENDED: Comedienne Lisa Lampanelli doesn't play favorites with her own ilk. She's roasted other comics to bits, serving as the only female named to the skewer panels for both Chevy Chase and Jeff Foxworthy. Her searing insults for the rest of the universe swim laps in the gutter Saturday at the Majestic Theatre, 7PM.
SOPHISTICATED FOLK: Trueblood roots music heats up Hailey's Saturday with the banjo-toting Burntsienna Trio, as sought-after Denton sound guy Justin Collins takes a break from quips behind the board to sing the blues. With Joe Fletcher, Samuel James, and must-see local group Spooky Folk. 9PM.
ANIMAL OF A DEAL: Sunday's the last chance for Dallas Zoo patrons to see the "Ghosts from the Bayou" alligator swamp habitat and other climate-bucking wonders for half-price admission ($5 for standard tickets) and giveaways as part of the Target Zoofari Days promotion. DART riders can keep even more of their money. 9AM-5PM.