Houston, You Are a Problem

City newspaper ranks ‘most hated cities,’ excludes hometown

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    NEWSLETTERS

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    This, according to the Houston Chronicle, is overrated.

    It is well chronicled in these cyber-pages that I do not like Houston, and that I am a blooming idiot — hi Anonymous 1 and 2, I’ve missed you — because of that opinion.

    So let’s just pour a little gas on that fire, shall we? We shall.

    The editors of the Houston Chronicle Monday published an online item ranking the most hated cities in the United States based on no other methodology — at least that meets the naked eye — than, “These 20 big cities think they're the big time, but a lot of people say they're overrated.”

    How many is "a lot" and who are these "people?" Overrated equals hated? This new math just confuses me.

    This might be the funniest part: They listed Beaumont and excluded Houston, and, uh, hey boys and girls, which one of those two belongs on any list of big cities to the exclusion of the other?

    Dallas, of course, makes the list at No. 9, and I will begrudgingly grant them that, give or take a few rungs on that ladder, because take away that stupid TV show and the Cowboys, and you’re not left with much in the way of international significance other then a dead president. Still, I love this town even if I don’t exactly know why.

    But seriously, Washington, D.C., pretty much the capital of the Western free world and a cultural mecca, is overrated? Las Vegas, the adult playground of the continent, is overrated? New York, for God's sake? This is a joke, right? Or a play for added page views.

    Houston, you are a problem … of your own making.

    Bruce Felps owns and operates East Dallas Times, an online community news outlet serving the White Rock Lake area. If Houston is the large intestine of Texas, he wonders what that would make Port Arthur.