Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you stay at home and celebrate the removal of the rocky mountain wolf from the Endangered Species list. Now let’s go shoot one! LET’S GO!
TOP CHEF MASTERS – 10:00PM (Bravo – an NBC/Universal network) Christina Hendricks alert! Christina Hendricks alert! Christina Hendricks alert! This is not a drill! Good gosh almighty, we have a bonafide Christina Hendricks alert! The buxom actress (YAY!) and her husband (Booooooooooooo) have a “groovy 60’s challenge” for the star chefs this week. I hope at least one of the chefs makes a soup, for soup requires buxom actresses to frequently lean forward. ANTICIPATION: HENDRICKS!
HAPPY ENDINGS – 9:30PM (ABC) After a new episode of “Modern Family” tonight (finally), ABC unleashes this brand new sitcom starring the tasty Elisha Cuthbert as a gal who ditches her fiancé at the altar, and the ensuing chaos among their friends that arises from the breakup. So it’s a show with very attractive actors, who are “friends,” and the first episode is someone running away from a wedding. Man, that sounds familiar. Where have I seen that kind of show before? WAIT! I got it. “Barney Miller.” It’s just like “Barney Miller.” ANTICIPATION: ANISTON WANTS ROYALTIES!
STANLEY CUP PLAYOFFS – 7:00PM (Versus) The Stanley Cup playoffs begin tonight with six matchups, including Coyotes-Red Wings on Versus starting at seven. Which NHL team will be lucky enough to have the fewest injuries and be left standing at the end of a playoff that’s less about talent and skill than it is about random attrition? Find out! ANTICIPATION: OLD TIME HOCKEY!
COUNTDOWN TO ZERO – 9:00PM (History Channel) Filmmaker Lucy Walker studies the origin of the atomic bomb and the role it has played (very large) in international relations ever since its inception. She interviews Tony Blair, Jimmy Carter, and Mikhail Gorbachev. Gorby! I was wondering what old Gorby was up to. I assume he’s been drinking vodka in a steam bath. I assume that of all Russians. ANTICIPATION: GORBITUDE!
LAW & ORDER: SVU – 10:00PM (NBC) Your special guest start tonight is… (spins wheel) Maria Bello! Will she be A) an assault victim, B) a defensive parent of an accused rapist, or C) a drug addict? If you guessed C, you get my grand prize, which is nothing. ANTICIPATION: ALWAYS ROOM FOR B-E-L-L-O!