Blue Star
The center of the Dallas Cowboys universe

Six Fearless, Hopeless Predictions For Monday Night Vs. New York

View Comments (
)
|
Email
|
Print
Six Fearless, Hopeless Predictions For Monday Night Vs. New York

Getty Images

MINNEAPOLIS - OCTOBER 17: E.J. Henderson (second from left) #56 of the Minnesota Vikings intercepts a pass intended for Jason Witten #82 of the Dallas Cowboys during the first quarter at Mall of America Field on October 17, 2010 in Minneapolis, Minnesota. The Vikings defeated the Cowboys 24-21. (Photo by Jeff Gross/Getty Images) *** Local Caption *** E.J. Henderson

advertisement

*Wade Phillips will guide the Cowboys to a 34-3 loss, spill nacho cheese on himself during the game, and accidentally run over Jerry Jones’ dog. Afterward, Jerry will reaffirm that Wade is the man to lead his team.

*Outside linebacker Anthony Spencer will be flagged for a helmet-to-helmet hit against the Giants’ Mario Manningham. Seemingly from nowhere, the Pittsburgh Steelers’ James Harrison will barge onto the field and scream, “That’s preposterous!” and then retire. The next day, he will unretire.

*Hank Williams, Jr., or Bocephus if you will, will ask us, “Are you ready for some football?!” We will say, “Uh, yeah, why not.”

*In the third quarter of Monday night’s game, the field at Cowboys Stadium will be besieged by malevolent dinosaurs. Jerry Jones will reveal afterward that it was his fault, that he was in the process of adding a “Jurassic Park” style theme park to his stadium. “We’re trying to create a fan atmosphere here that’s unforgettable,” he’ll explain, grinning. “With dinosaurs.”

*Before the game, someone will try to explain Chaos Theory to Eli Manning. Manning will look really confused. Then, his head will explode.

*Instead of cheering on the sidelines of Cowboys Stadium, as they normally do, the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders will choose to come and cheer and jiggle about in my apartment on Monday night. It will make watching this Cowboys team almost bearable.

 

Stay on top of the latest Dallas Cowboys news with NBCDFW.com. Follow NBC DFW Sports on Facebook or have breaking Cowboys news sent directly to your phone with Blue Star SMS alerts. Text "bluestar" to 622339 (NBCDFW) to subscribe to this free service.  Read more about it here.

Leave Comments