Last week, I chronicled all the numerous ways in which the Cowboys fortunes have turned since tabloid superstar and mom jeans enthusiast Jessica Simpson attempted to curse the team. Simpson’s hex had clearly backfired on her. The Cowboys were winning, her sister was getting fired from a show you don’t watch, and her dog was dognapped by coyotes. It was clear that Simpson had turned her bad luck juju onto herself, karmic payback for her petty bitterness towards her ex-boyfriend Tony Romo.
Well, it appears Simpson is now chastened, and decided to again begin openly supporting the team and Romo once more. Extra TV reports:
Jessica Simpson may have been dumped by Tony Romo -- but she's still his biggest fan.
The singer, 29, has been cheering on her ex-beau's Dallas Cowboys.
"Can't forget the Cowboys! Great game yesterday," she posted on Twitter Monday. The Cowboys beat the Philadelphia Eagles 20 to 16 Sunday.
Allow me to speak for all Cowboys fans when I say NOOOOOOOOOOO! You know what’s going to happen now, don’t you? Now that this temptress has once again thrown her buxom weight behind America’s Team? DISASTER.
This team was doing so well without your support, Jessica. They were in first place! With one of the league’s best offenses! And Flozell Adams hasn’t held anyone in a little while! It’s been so nice here without you! We don’t want your support. We CAN’T have your support. We’re doomed with it.
For her part, Simpson abandoned her pink Romo jersey to prevent a redux of the brutal late season hex she placed upon the Cowboys in 2007.
"My pink jersey was nowhere in sight ;)" added Simpson, who has been criticized for jinxing Romo's team by showing up in the stands in the No. 9 jersey.
"I was screaming in my parents' TV in Dallas gear though :)," she adds.
A few minutes later, Simpson posted a shout-out to Romo, ''Tougher Than The Rest YAY 9."
This won’t do. People of Dallas, your season will be ruined if this sudden good will Simpson has for the team is allowed to continue unabated. We must take strides to make sure she continues disliking the team and wishing it harm. That way, the team will stay awesome and Simpson’s life will spiral further down into the gutter. I suggest Tony Romo dump her AGAIN. I suggest he take her out to dinner, get her all excited about a possible reconciliation, and then throw mashed potatoes in her face. Something. ANYTHING to prevent her from liking this team once more.
Otherwise, you can go ahead and cancel those playoff tickets.